Review: The Revenant

The Revenant Leonardo DiCaprio

In 2014, the dude who made Babel, Alejandro Iñárritu, reunited Michael Keaton with his most iconic role as Batman in the fantastic Birdman. Now he’s remade another 80’s classic, The Terminator, with Leonardo DiCaprio assuming the role as the unstoppable killing machine. Only this time instead of being set in the present it’s set in the past. And he’s not actually called the Terminator. He’s now The Revenant. But he has the same amount of lines as Arnie did, and he fights a bear, so it’s all gravy.

Bears, oh my!

DiCaprio Returns to Claim Oscars and Kill Bears in The Revenant

The Revenant 2015 Leonardo DiCaprio

Just like that whole thing about Sad Keanu, I bet that Leonardo DiCaprio (The Departed) is well aware of all the amusement caused by his lack of Oscar wins. However, his time for terrible, terrible revenge may have finally come. Soon, he could be smushing the blood of bears and Tom Hardy (Star Trek – Nemesis) into our once-smug, fat faces. He will stand above us, God-like, before braining us mercilessly with his golden war trophy.

Let it be known that The Revenant is coming. And awards are (likely) coming with him.

Read More of This Oscar Shit Here