Review: Near Dark

Near Dark Poster Bill Paxton

The nukes are coming, and the end of humanity is coming with them. Estimates project you have about 90 more minutes before the surface of the Earth starts to resemble Gary Oldman’s face in Hannibal. You’re left with one ultimate question: what is the last vampire love film you watch? The Lost Boys if you happen to like good movies or Twilight if you don’t. The choice is that simple. Or is it?

Enter Kathryn Bigelow’s Near Dark.

Vampire Shit Abounds Within

Review: Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice – Ultimate Edition

Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice Poster

You know, this was the first Batman movie I hadn’t seen at the cinema since Batman Returns. I was put off by all the negativity, the blatant fanboyism, and the fact that Man of Steel was such a dull mess. That’s right, I may have suffered Batman & Robin, but I wouldn’t suffer this. C’mon -even without seeing the trailers, it was obvious that Batman and Superman would make up, buddy up, and then take out some common foe. Yet, hot on the heels of Marvel’s R-rated superhero release, Deadpool, director Zak Snyder (300) chose to release an ultimate uncut edition too. It’s his definitive vision of the story, he says. And so, like Rocky or some other boxing movie character, I chose to step into the ring one last time. I’m a glutton for punishment.

Read more of this Super-Batshit here

Review: Ali

Ali film poster will smith

We spend a lot of our lives learning about what other people did. Scientists call this “history”. And while so much has happened between the time our Mother’s birthed us unto this wretched Earth and now, we still think as most things having happened a long, long time ago. Then someone cool dies and you realize that “Shit, I was actually alive at the same time as this great dude”. I bet someone had that exact same feeling when badasses like da Vinci or Wyatt Earp died. In this case, it’s sad it has to be Muhammad Ali.

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